if i gasped would you be more likely to believe me?

we have gathered our stuffed animals and our soft pillows in a corner as a barricade against our childhoods, for they were fantastic.

and who says we grew into anything
other than what we would be?
we all have these little stories about little things
that we wave like flags
and paint on our bodies for important events:
once upon a time chris told me he was going to become a communist;
he thought he could look good in earth tones.
once upon a time i saw this woman and thought
she had a gap in her teeth you could drive a buick through.
and once upon a time you were abandoned on a street corner naked
when you were three
for a whole lifetime of thirty minutes.


now i cannot talk to you about the mathematics of facts and stories
the equations involved
the differentials
and other things I remember from old textbooks.
i don't have the head for numbers
but i'm pretty good at all the basic operations
and sometimes i can solve for x in my head.