isn't this what you were looking for?

tomorrow is another day

they sat across from each other at the chipped table
drinking from separate cups.
the linoleum was covered with whales.

she told him he had better watch out,
or she was going to slide a frozen disc of her own pee
under his bedroom door at night.
he said but it’s our bedroom door.

the air conditioner started up suddenly.
he thought about what it would be like to be swallowed by a whale.
she turned and coughed, thinking about a man she once saw
tackle a horse to the ground.
she remembered its legs were like felt shotguns.
she remembered how he hugged it.

overhead, a swarm of unmarked airplanes
flew by.

1 comment:

j o l i said...

i enjoy the first little room.

i think 'fiesta ware' needs to be changed. it's dated. these poems are timeless, you know.

i think that the second little room gets too descriptive.
maybe it could just be something like 'slide a frozen disc of piss under the door' or whuteva.

the last sentence of the second little room is primo.

i think it's nice to revisit the whale imagery, but maybe it could be said in a way that doesn't directly say 'whale' again. i dont know... it's just too repetitive in such a small hotel... ;)

and where is she turning? away from him? that is too ambiguous.

the last part of the third little room has great imagery once you can discern exactly what's being said, but it needs to be cleaned up. it's rather confusing as-is.

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